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I am tired of character deffects.
Tired of lugging them around like a recovery badge of honor.
Can't I just be human? Human with faults, in acceptance of them.
Not trying to remove them all.
Not asking anyone or anyTHING to take them from me.
Just saying, "Guess what? I'm not perfect, but I'm fabulous."
Maybe I don't need to down myself as part of the game.
Maybe the game is to love myself.
And to love you. Even if you do stupid shit.
Even if you say you're not good enough,
not ready,
not capable.
I think you are. We ALL are.
We are ALL worthy of love,
able to be in relationships,
and free to make mistakes.
Who am I to say that I know nothing?
I know something:
Love is free.
Love is here, right now.
Love is beautiful.
And so are you.
So, here I am...single.
I can't recall ever being single before. I think I came out the womb with a ring on. When I was two and on vacation with the fam in Hawaii, I met a boy on the beach and latched onto to him like calf to teet. Back in Seattle, my best friend was the male half of fraternal twins, Sean and Laura. I spent a few years in between childhood and teen years wandering around lost with various girlfriends, always feeling like an outsider, until high school where I met Jon, my best bud for several years.
I "dated" a little (Dating = a bean burrito from Taco Bell and a case of Schimdt Ice for dessert - then sex in the back of your Chevy Nova) but nothing really stuck until I turned 17. Then I met Dan # 1 (aka, Dan, Dan, The Leather Man - need I say more?) After Dan I moved on to Larry - the dreadlocked rock-god who was WAY out of my league and galaxy. After Larry, I did a 180 and ended up out on the streets with an ex-con tweeker named "Evil". He put my ass in a domestic violence shelter after punching me in the face three times and giving me a word-slurring concussion. I came home with my tail between my legs and ended up with Brendan - the manipulative genious. After Brendan, I met Dan # 2, the gay alcoholic. After two years of sloppy sex and baby-speak, I needed a REAL man, so I married Rocco, the drug-dealing pot-head with a minivan. Well, that didn't last, so I left him for Aaron. The man I still love, yet had to let go.
And that brings me to today.
So, as I said, after a (so far) lifetime, of attachment, I am finally ALONE. I can do anything I want - as long as it doesn't involve another bloody fucking man.
I'm going to go back to writing, take a trapeze class, sing in a band, and any other thing I wasn't "allowed" to do under the thumb of various exes. I am as free as the public school system (i.e., under-funded, liberal, and prepared to strike at any moment).
Why must I feel like I have to have a plan? What happened to "one day at a time"? Now that I am single, I want to figure out what my entire future is going to be. I guess I have a lot of fear. When I was with Aaron, I had a plan. I wasn't crazy about all of it, but most of it was good, and damn, it was a plan. Now I feel like I have so many choices that I have no idea where to start.
I made an appointment to see a career counselor, and, guess what? The next available appointment is over a month from now. Is that God telling me to slow down or what? I wonder why I'm so dead set on figuring everything out right this second.
The fact is, I am in school right now and only a few weeks into the quarter. I have a decent job, albeit only part-time, I have a safe, comfortable place to live with all the amenities, I have a great sponsor and I chair an AA meeting every Tuesday, which I love to do. I just feel like this isn't where I'm supposed to be...I know, I know, it's EXACTLY where I'm supposed to be. But it's not where I want to be.
I don't know where I want to be, or what I want to be doing. I have ideas, but I don't know if they're right. It seems likes everything is so far away from me. Grad school costs so much, plus I'd have to study for the GRE, get something (or more) published, and learn a foreign language, etc.
I wonder, is Office Management really right for me? I know it's practical, but I'm bored. Should I be bored already? I don't know.
I have so many unanswered questions, I just want to figure out some kind of plan, some path to head down. I am scared. I don't want to look back at my life and regret that I didn't do something amazing.
Using the GPS she stole from Dexter's car, Lila makes her way to the cabin where Dexter has Doakes locked up. Doakes tells Lila that Dexter is the Bay Harbor Butcher, but if he was hoping for a sympathetic ear, he won't get it from Lila; she still views Dexter as her "soul mate". Frank and Debra decide to go on an ice fishing holiday, but work gets in the way. Dexter and Rita reconcile, but when Lila threatens the children, Dexter decides he needs a permanent solution to that problem. Lila isn't quite ready to move on quietly.
In a dead drug dealer's cabin, somewhere in the everglades, Dexter Morgan (Michael C. Hall) contemplates his evil and how it may have killed Harry. Locked in a chain link cage, Sgt James Doakes (Erik King,) listens impassively to Dexter's ramblings. Doakes offers to help Dexter, telling Dexter that it's over. Furiously Dexter lashes out, telling Doakes, "It's over when I say it's over."
Dexter continues to lament Harry's Code and lays down on the table where he has just killed Harlow, the man who killed his mother. Doakes watches from his cage and tells Dexter to turn himself in, if only to save Rita and the kids from being hurt. Doakes offers to help Dexter. Dexter's phone rings.
Dr. Hill (Tony Colitti) tells Dexter that Lila Tournay (Jaime Murray) is at the hospital, and that Dexter is listed as her emergency contact. Dexter, uninterested, tries to explain that he's not responsible for Lila. Dr. Hill warns that there are legal complications. Dexter, curious, agrees to go to the hospital. As soon as Dexter leaves the cabin, Doakes tries to smash his way out of his cage.
Dexter finds Angel Batista (David Zayas) in the waiting room at the hospital. Dr. Hill tells Dexter that rohypnol was found in Lila's system, and that she has no recollection of what happened. She has also requested a rape kit. Knowing that Lila wasn't raped, Dexter goes into her room to talk to her.
Dexter tells Lila that what she's doing won't work. Lila says she won't press charges against Angel if Dexter takes her back. Upset, Dexter leaves.
Angel and Dexter worry. Dr. Hill tells Dexter that Lila has 72 hours to press charges. As he leaves, Dexter tells Angel that if he could choose a person to be like, it would be Angel. Angel, confused, accepts the compliment. Dexter wonders how his life came to this and worries that Doakes might be right - his "cancer" is spreading.
Debra Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter) and Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine) have breakfast. FBI Deputy Director Max Adams (Jonathan Banks) texts and orders them back to work, the Bay Harbor Butcher's weapons have been found.
At the station, Adams and Lundy exchange tense greetings. Adams briefs the Special Task Force - Doakes' fingerprints were found on the killing tools that Dexter dumped off the dock earlier. Lundy questions why he wasn't informed on the killing tools earlier. Adams tells him that he dropped the ball. Adams also produces a survellience photo of Doakes buying gas at a gas station. Vince Masuka (C.S. Lee) shakes his head at the cost of gas at the station. Dexter worries that he's made a mess of things.
In the cabin, Doakes breaks free from the cage. He runs.
Deb and Angel talk. Officers walk in with a warrant for Angel's arrest. Lila has pressed charges. Telling Dexter that it's okay, Angel goes with the agents. Dexter, upset at the trouble he has caused for Angel, worries about what to do. Dexter's phone rings. It's Rita Bennett (Julie Benz) with a stalled car. Dexter leaves to help her.
Doakes makes his way through the everglades. He faces off with an alligator. Seeing a boat coming up through the swamp, he flags it down. Doakes asks the two men on board (Wilmer Calderon, Gilbert Saldivar) for help and identifies himself as a police officer. The men knock him out.
Debra finds a dejected Lundy writing up a report for Adams. Lundy worries that he's made a bad call, letting Doakes get away. Deb tells Lundy that he's a god.
Dexter surveys Rita's car. He gives Rita the keys to the minivan. Dexter asks Rita to take the kids out of school the next day and join him for a day on his boat.
Dexter arrives at the cabin to find Doakes missing. Hearing footsteps approaching, he sees Doakes being led to the cabin by two men with guns. Dexter hides. One of the men brings cocaine out of the cabin. Seeing Dexter, Doakes distracts one of the men while Dexter quickly dispatches the man in the cabin. Doakes attacks the man holding the gun on him. Dexter shoots and kills the man. Doakes thanks Dexter for saving him.
After feeding the bodies of the two men to the alligators, Dexter locks Doakes back into the cage. Dexter tells Doakes that he's going to take responsibility for what he is, and that he wants to turn himself in. Doakes tells Dexter that he's made a good call. Dexter looks forward to finally getting some sleep in prison. Dexter tells Doakes he needs a day to get his affairs in order.
While contemplating the moon, Dexter calls Deb, telling her that he has papers for her to sign. He apologizes to Deb for Lila. A calm settles over Dexter.
Lt Maria Laguerta (Lauren Velez) and Cpt Tom Matthews (Geoffrey Pierson) talk. Maria asks for a personal day to find evidence to save Doakes. Matthews refuses. Maria tells him she's taking the day off anyway.
Angel, Masuka and Deb do shots. Deb tells Angel to stay tough. Masuka wonders about having a killer under their noses, then realizes that he's being insensitive to Deb regarding her past connection to the Ice Truck Killer. Deb is unbothered.
Dexter goes to Lila's loft. He tells Lila to drop the charges. Lila tells Dexter that Angel should face the consequences. Dexter tells Lila that he won't be around after tomorrow. Lila, concerned, demands to know where he is going.
Deb and Lundy make dinner. Deb wonders how men can be so stupid where women are concerned. Deb asks Lundy to search the FBI database for information on Lila. Lundy searches and discovers that Lila has no papertrail. Deb realizes that Lila's using an alias.
Masuka takes Angel's microwave oven to the lab to process for Lila's fingerprints. Dexter brings Marlene (Mary Ostrow) a notary public to see Deb, along with living trust papers for Deb to sign. Deb is creeped out. Marlene assures Deb that "we're all going to die eventually."
Dexter tells Deb that he stopped by LIla's. He invites Deb over for dinner.
Maria, in Haiti, calls Lundy. She tells Lundy that she talked to Leonis (Peter Macon) who know Doakes from Black Ops, and that Doakes asked for Leonis' help in finding a lab to process the blood slides. That, coupled with evidence that two special ops cases conflict with Bay Harbor Butcher kill dates, leads Lundy to agree that the evidence is worth investigating.
Dexter, Rita, Cody (Preston Bailey) an Astor (Christina Robinson) enjoy a day on the boat. Lila watches from a distance. As they head out to sea, Lila breaks into the minivan and steals Dexter's GPS unit. Dexter tells Rita that he's never been a very good boyfriend, but that she's important to him. Touched, Rita kisses Dexter. Dexter gives Rita the pink slip to the minivan. Rita thanks him.
Deb tells Lundy that Lila's real name is Lila West and that she's in the US on an expired Visa. Lundy urges caution.
Deb visits Lila. Deb tells her to leave and threatens her with deportation. LIla schemes.
Lila heads to her jeep with Dexter's GPS unit. She follows the directions to Dexter's last destination.
In his apartment, Dexter prepares steaks for Deb, anticipating the relief he will have once she knows what he is. Going over the various scenarios, Dexter imagines telling Deb that he's the Bay Harbor Butcher. Scenario 1: Deb chokes to death on her steak. Scenario 2: Deb arrests him. Scenario 3: Deb cries. Scenario 4: Deb kills him. Dexter realizes that telling Deb won't be easy.
Deb arrives with news that she ran Lila out of town. Dexter drinks with Deb, who tells Dexter that she finally feels like she's "back" - the "new and improved" Deb since the Ice Truck Killer and Rudy. Dexter asks if she ever considered doing something drastic after everything that happened with Rudy. Deb tells Dexter that she thought of Dexter, and that's what kept her from losing her mind. Dexter asks how she finally got through it. Deb tells Dexter that "it's about deciding who you are, and who you want to be," and riding it out. Deb and Dexter eat steak.
Dexter decides that he's changed his mind about turning himself in, and that he'll ride it out instead, and frame Doakes for the murders as planned. Deb's phone rings with news that Doakes' car has been found. Knowing that it's only a matter of time before the feds discover the cabin, Dexter worries that they will find Doakes locked in a cage, which will ruin the plan to frame him.
In the cabin, Doakes hears a car approaching. He yells for help as Lila walks in the door.
In Jimenez' cabin in the everglades, Dexter Morgan, (Michael C. Hall) tends to his gunshot wound in his leg, while Sgt James Doakes (Erik King) looks on from inside his locked cage. Dexter notes that the bullet only grazed him. Dexter and Doakes compare notes - Doakes a hunter of killers, and Dexter answering to a higher code, which requires a level of proof to determine what a killer is. Dexter apologizes to Doakes for having to leave him. As Dexter leaves the cabin, Doakes screams.
At the station, Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine) and Debra Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter) arrive at work, now "out" as a couple. Doakes phone logs have come in, and Lt Maria Laguerta's (Lauren Velez') number is on them. Lundy asks Deb to ream Maria. Deb doesn't want to, feeling odd about dressing down a boss. Lundy tells Deb that she better get used to it, given that he'll soon be gone, now that the case is almost over. Deb worries about what Lundy meant by his comment.
Dexter arrives back at his apartment, climbing in through his bathroom window to avoid the protective detail assigned to protect him while the suspect Doakes is still at large. Dexter reminisces about Harry, and wonders what Harry would do. In flashback, a teen Dexter and teen Deb listen as father Harry Morgan (James Remar) discuss a murdered prostitute, calling her pimp an evil killer.
Dexter is roused from his thoughts by his protective detail, who tell him that Rita Bennett (Julie Benz) wants to see him. Rita hands Dexter a coffee. They sit down in his kitchen to talk. Rita expresses her concern about Doakes being the Bay Harbor Butcher. Dexter asks about the kids. Rita tells Dexter that the kids are confused. Dexter admits to general confusion himself. Dexter's gunshot wound begins to bleed. Before Rita notices, he covers it with a dish towel. Rita worries that the kids feel abandoned. Dexter asks if they can start dating again, but Rita is unsure. She recommends that they hang out at the beach on Saturday.
Deb eyes Maria and then confronts her in her office. Deb shows Maria the phone records. Maria evenly tells Deb that the Special Task Force doesn't need her help to railroad Doakes, and that he won't call her again.
The Special Task Force reviews Doakes' four fake IDs, issued when he was with Black Ops. Dexter approaches Lundy about getting rid of his protective detail. Lundy asks Deb to brief the team about the forensics. Deb is cool to Lundy. Angel Batista (David Zayas) steps in. Eighteen of the slides match Bay Harbor Butcher victimes, twelve others match missing persons with criminal records. Lundy tells Dexter that there will be more forensics work coming his way. Lundy asks Dexter if Deb is okay.
Maria approaches Angel and asks to see the names of the victims. Angel complies.
At the cabin, Doakes tries to break out of his cage. Seeing a cell phone on the table, Doakes feels hopeful.
Vince Masuka (C.S. Lee) and Dexter look for trace evidence on a pile of clothing. Deb is angry at Dexter for getting rid of his protective detail. Deb bitterly complains that Lundy is moving on and that Dexter is the only one she can count on. Dexter privately worries that Deb is losing it, and then comes to the realization that it's not about him - it's about Deb, Rita and the kids, and that they have to be protected from finding out that Dexter is the real Bay Harbor Butcher.
In the cabin, Doakes uses his belt to try to get the cell phone on the table. Dexter arrives at the cabin. Doakes throws his shirt out of the cage, covering the cell phone from sight.
Dexter gives Doakes a bottle of water, which Doakes gulps down. Dexter lays out his killing tools on the table and tells Doakes that one of the two killers in the cabin has to go away. Dexter wonders which of the two has more worth. Dexter says that after much thought, he's decided that his personal life has more people who would be devastated if they knew what he was. Doakes complains, saying that he has a mother and sisters who would miss him. Dexter points out that Doakes never visits them, so they don't really count. Dexter finds the phone that Doakes has tried to hide.
Doakes realizes that Dexter has put a sedative in his bottle of water. Doakes tells Dexter that Harry would have hated to see what has become of Dexter. Dexter informs Doakes that the legendary Harry was the one who trained him. Doakes, not terribly surprised, laughs and says that Harry was no legend, and insinuates that he knows a secret about Harry, just before passing out. Dexter, upset and confused, screams at the unconscious Doakes to tell him what he knows about Harry.
In Lila Tournay's (Jaime Murray's) loft, Angel paints a wall red. Angel gets a call. Happily, he tells Lila that he'll get his daughter for a weekend visit.
Dexter puts an unconscious Doakes' prints on the killing tools. Taking the tools to a nearby dock, Dexter dumps them in the water, knowing that the weekend dive class will find them. Dexter wonders about Harry, and what Doakes meant by his comments.
In flashback, a teen Deb cuts her birthday cake. Then-Lt.Tom Matthews (Geoffrey Pierson) visits the house to talk to Harry. An upset Harry smashes his beer bottle against a wall, angry that his suspect, the evil pimp, will walk due to technicalities. Matthews apologizes and leaves. As Deb gets a vacuum cleaner to clean up the broken glass, Harry tells the teenage Dexter that, "I did the right thing in training you."
Lundy confronts the icy Deb. Deb tells Lundy to go ahead and leave. Lundy tells Deb that he thought she understood that when the case ends, they end.
Angel complains to Dexter that there is never a circus in town when he needs one. Explaining that he has his daughter for the weekend, he asks Dexter what 7 year olds like. Dexter tells Angel that he and Rita are taking the kids to the beach. Angel asks to tag along. Dexter notices red paint in Angel's hair. Angel tells him that it's from Lila's.
Dexter, still holding onto Jimenez' phone, sees a text from Christopher Harlow. Worried, Dexter texts back, telling Harlow to meet at the cabin. Harlow replies that he doesn't know anything about the cabin. Dexter, relieved, feels safe.
Deb and Dexter talk. Dexter asks Deb about the birthday where Harry threw the beer bottle, telling Deb that he's trying to remember the killer who went free. Dexter wonders what else was going on with Harry.
Lila shows up at the station. Angel catches up with her and reminds her that he has his daughter for the weekend. Angel tells Lila that he's joining Dexter and Rita at the beach. Lila invites Angel and Dexter and Rita and the kids to an art class. Angel gently explains that Dexter and Rita are trying to work things out, and that an art class for all of them wouldn't be a very good idea. Upset, Lila leaves.
At the cabin, Dexter asks Doakes about Harry. Doakes tells Dexter that Harry's code is preventing Dexter from killing him, and suggests that Dexter has a conscience. Dexter, furious, demands to know what Doakes knows about Harry. Doakes tells Dexter that he found out something about Harry's death, a mystery that someone didn't want solved.
Dexter goes to the golfcourse to see Cpt Matthews. He asks about Harry's death. Matthews tells Dexter it was Harry's heart. Dexter tells the Captain that he knows there was more to it than that. Matthews, resigned, tells Dexter that it was inevitable that Dexter would find out, and confesses that towards the end, Harry "lost it" and killed himself. Not believing that Harry could commit suicide, Dexter wonders about the proof. Matthews admits that the day before the suicide, Harry called him and asked that he keep an eye on Dexter and his sister. Matthews hid the autopsy report so that the information wouldn't leak out.
Maria brings Lundy proof of Doakes' innocence - her personal stake-out notes that show that Maria and Doakes were on a stake-out when one of the victims went missing. Lundy dissmisses Maria. Maria presses him. Lundy angrily tells Maria that her credibility and ethics were compromised when she protected Doakes by not reporting their phone conversation, and that her personal notes are now worthless.
Angel chases the kids at the beach. Dexter's leg hurts where he was shot by Doakes. Rita, wondering about Dexter's funk, tentatively suggests that it's too soon for the two of them. Dexter tells her that he discovered Harry committed suicide, and wonders why he'd do that. Rita comforts Dexter. Jimenez' phone rings - Harlow has found the cabin and is on his way. Dexter texts back for Harlow to meet him at The Swamp, the bar where Jimenez worked, in one hour.
Lila meets drug dealer Chad (Tyson Chambers) and buys rophies.
Lundy and Deb have dinner. Deb apologizes for yelling at him and not saying what she wants. She tells Lundy that she was excited by the possibilites of their relationship, and that he crushed her by unilaterally deciding that it would end when the case ended. Lundy's phone rings - a hit came up on one of Doakes' fake IDs.
Angel paints Lila's apartment. Lila gives Angel wine. She asks about Dexter and Rita. Angel tells her that they are working things out. Lila drinks wine from the bottle and takes Angel to the bedroom, telling him that she likes it rough.
Dexter brings Harlow's body to the cabin, telling Doakes that it will be the Bay Harbor Butcher's final victim. Doakes desperately tries to talk sense into Dexter.
Lila, finished with Angel, tells him that she's "just getting started." She walks into the bathroom. She drinks rophies with wine. Angel dresses and hears Lila collapse. Finding her passed out on the floor, he dials 911.
Dexter prepares the cabin for his killing ritual. Doakes pleads with Dexter to not kill Harlow. Dexter dismembers Harlow as a desperate Doakes watches the river of blood flow into his cage.
As Dexter bags Harlow's body parts, he apologizes to the almost catatonic Doakes, who barely intones, "Stay away from me."
In flashback, Harry walks in to a room to find the teenaged Dexter dismembering the evil pimp. Teen Dexter happily tells Harry that he got the guy who killed the girl, and that he did it for Harry. Harry gets sick. Concerned, Dexter asks Harry if he's ok. Harry tells Dexter to stay away from him.
In a moment of clarity, Dexter suddenly realizes that while Harry's idea was noble, the reality of Dexter - his son - as a trained killer was something that Harry could not live with. Dexter, full of despair, tells Doakes, "I killed my father."
Dexter Morgan (Michael C. Hall) and sister Debra Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter) arrive at the station, Dexter dragging something heavy, cumbersome and, judging from the startled looks of his coworkers, disturbing. Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine) sees Dexter and yells at him to get "that thing" out of the office. Dexter looks down to see that he is dragging the plastic-wrapped corpse of Jimenez, the man who killed his mother. As Dexter's eyes follow the trail of blood smeared along the station house floor, Angel Batista (David Zayas) holds up Jimenez' severed foot and admonishes the flabbergasted Dexter.
Dexter awakens to the sound of a newspaper landing on the doorstep of estranged girlfriend Rita's house. Relieved to discover that he was only dreaming, Dexter wonders what his subconscious might have been trying to tell him. Rita Bennet (Julie Benz) steps outside to discover that Dexter has spent the night on the lawnchair in front of her house. Dexter explains his concern for her after the apparent break-in of her home. Rita is touched. Dexter apologizes to Rita for everything he's put her through, and expresses his profound regret over getting involved with Lila Tournay (Jaime Murray.) Astor (Christina Robinson) and Cody (Preston Bailey) are thrilled to see Dexter, who tells them that he only stopped by for a hug.
Leaving Rita's house, Dexter ponders calling in sick to deal with Jimenez' body, which Dexter left behind at the cabin in the everglades after Rita's call about the break-in. Noticing that he is being followed by two men, likely FBI agents, Dexter decides to follow Harry's code and take care of Jimenez later.
Lt. Maria Laguerta (Lauren Velez) calls Sgt. James Doakes (Erik King,) still on suspension. Getting his voice mail, Maria leaves an angry message, telling him that Lundy is trying to reach him. Doakes arrives at the airport as Maria finishes her message - she's not giving up on him.
Deb and Lundy wake up together. Lundy notes Deb's slim physique and says he wants to fatten her up. Deb tells Lundy that she appreciates a man with experience. Lundy worries about dating a co-worker and feels that full disclosure is the best policy. Deb, worried, tells him that the timing is off. Lundy gets a call and immediately jumps out of bed, telling Deb that things at the station are in a tizzy.
At the station, Dexter finds Lundy's bees buzzing. Angel tells Maria that they have a suspect on the Bay Harbor Butcher case. Maria is certain that it's not one of her people. Angel asks Deb to find out more information, calling Deb "Lundy's pet." Maria breaks up their huddle to get some work done.
Vince Masuka (C.S. Lee) tells Dexter that he has company. Lundy has brought in his own forensics techs. A bitter Masuka worries.
Dexter meets the forensic experts who want access to Dexter's files and database. Dexter logs them into the database, noting privately that they won't find evidence implicating him on any work computers.
In flashback, Harry Morgan (James Remar) coaches a young Dexter (Devon Graye.) "What's the number one rule?" he demands. Dexter replies, "Don't get caught." Satisfied, Harry leads the young Dexter in to a small room, where others have gathered - to view an inmate's execution.
Deb goes to see Lundy. Deb tells Lundy that she's not embarrassed about their relationship. Lundy won't tell Deb what's going on at the station.
In Haiti, Doakes pays a visit to Leonis (Peter Macon) who runs a tour business. Doakes asks Leonis to find him a hospital with a discreet lab. Leonis, unwilling to help Doakes, tells him that he's not in Black Ops anymore and can't help him. Doakes says he just needs some slides analyzed and that he will also buy the most expensive tour package Leonis has to offer.
Later that day in Dexter's lab, the forensics techs find Dexter to be too helpful and tell him to go on home while they handle things. Dexter happily leaves, only to find that Lila is at the station, holding court with an attentive Angel and Masuka. Angel tells Dexter that he's hired Lila to be his decorator. Dexter takes Angel aside and tells him that Lila is no decorator. Lila tells Dexter that the boys at the station have invited her out for drinks. Worried that a drunk Lila will tell his secrets, Dexter agrees to join them.
At the bar, a tipsy Lila continues to flirt and then dangerously brings up the bowling alley parking lot incident with Jimenez. Angel asks Dexter if he filed a police report. Dexter quickly dismisses the incident, saying that the attacker was probably long gone. Lila excuses herself to use the loo.
Dexter follows Lila to the bathroom and tells her to stay away from him and his addiction. Lila passionately informs Dexter that she sees all of him, and that his friends "only see the mask." Lila tells Dexter that when she looks at him, it's like looking into a mirror.
Back at his apartment, Dexter worries about Lila. Suddenly, he realizes that someone's been in his apartment and discovers that his slides are gone from their hiding place. Panic sets in as Dexter fears that Lundy has discovered him. Deb arrives home, complaining that everyone at work just wants to talk to her to find out what Lundy knows about the Bay Harbor Butcher. Dexter demands to know what Lundy knows. An exasperated Deb is about to throw a fit when the FBI shows up at the door. They tell Dexter that Lundy wants him to see him. Dexter, assuming that it's all over, thinks about execution.
At the station, Dexter is confronted with his slides, now in an evidence bag on Lundy's desk. Lundy asks for an explanation. Dexter says they are trophies. To Dexter's surprise, Lundy agrees, and names Doakes as the suspect in the Bay Harbor Butcher murders. Lundy ticks off the evidence - Doakes' background in Black Ops, numerous write-ups for use of excessive force, his father a butcher, the trip to Haiti that morning, and now the slides found in Doakes' car. Lundy warns Dexter that Doakes will come after him and assigns Dexter a protective detail. Lundy names Dexter as first forensics tech to bring Doakes to justice, and hands Dexter his slides with orders to ID all the slides immediately.
Maria refuses to believe that Doakes is a killer. Deb assures Dexter that she'll take care of him. Dexter tells her to move to the new apartment where she will be safe.
Doakes calls Maria, who tells him that they found something in his car. Realizing that he's being set-up by Dexter, Doakes tells Maria that she meant a lot to him and that she won't hear from him again. Doakes disables his phone and takes off.
Dexter locks himself into his lab and draws the blinds. He methodically wipes the slide box clean of prints. He cleans each slide as well and begins processing all the samples. The FBI lab techs, now sympathetic to Dexter's situation as Doakes' next "victim," offer their help. Dexter tells them to watch everything for the next 12 hours. Dexter leaves the lab.
Angel catches up to Dexter and apologizes about Lila. Dexter warns that Lila is only using him. Angel doesn't care. Dexter and his protective detail file into the elevator.
Lundy and Deb argue about Dexter. Deb tells Lundy that he favors her. Maria confronts Lundy, insisting that Doakes is innocent and asks to take the lead with the media. Lundy refuses, saying that Doakes is a suspect. He tells Maria to cooperate or lose her job.
As Dexter rides home with his protective detail, Rita calls. She asks if it's really over between him and Lila. Dexter assures her that it's over. Rita admits to still having feelings for Dexter. They agree to talk, but Dexter tells her she has to wait because of a break in the Bay Harbor Butcher case. They hang up. Dexter tells the protective detail that he and Rita are getting together tomorrow to talk. "Communication's the key," advises one of the feds.
Dexter sneaks out of his apartment bathroom window that night to get away from his protective detail so that he can take care of Jimenez. Knowing that his car can be tracked, Dexter takes his boat to Jimenez' cabin.
At the station, Maria appeals to Deb to talk to Lundy. A frustrated Deb tells Maria that just because she's sleeping with Lundy doesn't mean she gets special treatment from him. A shocked Maria blurts out "You're sleeping with Lundy?" just as Angel and Lundy round the corner into the room. Angel is impressed.
Dexter carries a bag of Jimenez' body parts to his boat. He makes another trip to get the second bag. On returning, he realizes that someone's opened the first bag. Turning, he finds Doakes has him in his gun sight.
A shocked Doakes can't believe that Dexter is the Bay Harbor Butcher. He tells Dexter that he tracked him using the GPS on his boat. Dexter admits that Doakes was right about him. Doakes tells him that it's over and throws his handcuffs to Dexter, telling him to cuff himself. Dexter picks up the handcuffs and puts them on. Doakes approaches. Dexter walks towards Doakes a little too quickly. Doakes warns him to back off. As Doakes fires his weapon, Dexter grabs him and they go into the water. Dexter strangles Doakes who loses consciousness.
Doakes wakes to discover that he is locked in cage. Dexter watches him. The table where Jimenez' body was is back to holding packages of cocaine. Still needing to dump Jimenez' body, Dexter tells Doakes that he'll deal with him later. He leaves the cabin as Doakes screams "You're going to have to kill me, Morgan!"
Dexter Morgan (Michael C. Hall,) new girlfriend Lila Tournay (Jaime Murray) and sister Debra Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter,) share a tense breakfast. Deb and Lila bicker as Dexter privately compares his situation to living with a cobra and a mongoose. Deb leaves for work in a huff. Dexter finds Cody's (Preston Bailey) dragon zoombie toy in his briefcase. Lila warns that Cody is trying to control him.
A harried Rita Bennet (Julie Benz) discovers kids Astor (Christina Robinson) and Cody making a messy breakfast. Dexter arrives with doughnuts. Rita, not pleased to see him, nevertheless asks Dexter to watch the kids while she gets ready for work. Later, as Rita gets ready to leave with the kids, she asks Dexter to not drop by anymore. Dexter, hurt, agrees to stay away.
At the station, Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine) introduces some new faces and informs the Bay Harbor Butcher task force that they will be looking at past cases that the officers have worked on. Deb asks if they are under investigation. Angel Batista (David Zayas) warns that Lundy risks alienating the entire task force.
Angel, Dexter and Vince Masuka (C.S. Less) complain about the intimidation brought about by Lundy's investigation. Angel says that it is because Lundy knows someone from law inforcement was involved in the Bay Harbor Butcher case, but that Lundy is wrong to assume it's one of their own. They vow to stick together and not cooperate with Lundy. Lundy asks Dexter to meet to go over his old cases. Dexter immediately agrees. Angel complains to Dexter about not standing tough. Masuka, watching Lundy walk away, notes "That's how Hitler walked."
Lt. Maria Laguerta (Lauren Velez) and Sgt James Doakes (Erik King) walk and talk. Maria warns him to be more careful. Maria tells him his suspension case comes up for review soon. Doakes wonders if it is time to move on from the police force. Doakes tells Maria that his father was a butcher, and that maybe that's what he'll do too. Maria suggests setting up Doakes to meet with her friend from Stillwater Security about a job. Doakes agrees to the meeting.
Lundy gives Deb the Rodrigo file, an old drug dealer case. Deb feels weird about investigating collegues. Lundy asks Deb out on a date. Deb agrees.
Dexter cleans Lila's burned loft. Lila tells Dexter that the insurance company felt the fire was suspicious and won't give her a settlement check. Dexter notes the multiple points of origin of the fire and wonders if Lila could have started the fire. Dexter tells Lila that he saw Cody and that the meeting with Rita was awkward. Lila tells Dexter that he can't go back to Rita. Dexter leaves for work, leaving Lila to pout and fume.
Dexter and Lundy meet. Lundy offers Dexter tea. Worried that Lundy is trying to trip him up, Dexter tries to be agreable. Lundy points out that Dexter did bloodwork on four of the Bay Harbor Butcher victims prior to their deaths as part of other cases. Lundy asks Dexter if Deb likes meat or fish. Dexter, on alert to Lundy's tactics, tells him that Deb is a carnivore. Lundy points out to Dexter that he blew the Rodrigo case. Dexter admits to Lundy that he's caught offguard and doesn't know what to say. Lundy tells Dexter that Rodrigo got let off on the case because of Dexter's sloppy work.
Deb and Angel eat lunch. Angel is upset that Deb is working on the old Rodrigo case, especially since he was one of the original lead investigators on the case, but hands Deb the file anyway, saying that he's a reasonable man.
Lundy mercilessly criticizes Dexter's bloodwork on the Rodrigo case. Dexter admits a truth that he hopes Lundy will buy - he was overworked, there was a heatwave, and he overlooked things, which contributed to Rodrigo getting off. Lundy scrutinizes Dexter.
Deb and Angel go over the Rodrigo file. Deb finds a potential witness, Asher, named in the file. Angel and Deb go to visit him.
At Lenny Asher's (Bruce Weitz,) house, Angel and Deb discover that the man is a hoarder, with boxes and papers piled everywhere. Asher tells Angel that Rodrigo was a drug dealer, and that he took notes on Rodrigo's comings and goings. Deb asks if he still has his notes. Asher produces a box full of notes from 2002.
At the station, Deb pours over Asher's notes. Dexter worries about Lundy. Deb tells Dexter that she found an apartment for herself and that she has a date with Lundy. Dexter wonders if Deb is trying to sleep her way to the top. Angry, Deb throws Lila in Dexter's face and calls her "Vampire Lila."
At home, Dexter worries about Lundy trapping him and decides that Lila and "recovery" are too much of a risk. Lila calls Dexter and wants him to come over, but Dexter begs off, telling her it's bowling night. Lila tells Dexter she wants to go and asks where to meet them. Cornered, Dexter gives her the name of the bowling alley, Starlight Lanes, and the address.
Lila playfully flirts with Masuka and Angel at the Starlight Lanes. A smitten Angel tells Dexter that Lila is hot.
Deb meets Lundy at his apartment. Lundy cooks for Deb. Deb, impressed, swears her approval. Lundy chastises Deb on her potty mouth. Deb admits to being crass and dirty, and tells Lundy to get used to it. Lundy spanks Deb. They kiss.
Leaving the bowling alley, Dexter and Lila walk across the parking lot to their cars. Suddenly, a man with a knife appears out of nowhere and attacks Dexter from behind. Seeing him, Lila screams a warning. Dexter struggles with the man and then recognizes him - Santos Jimenez (Tony Amendola) the man who killed his mother. Masuka and Angel appear, weapons drawn. Jimenez gets away. Dexter, cut and bleeding tells them that the man tried to steal his watch. Lila, hearing the lie, tells Dexter to follow her to her loft to get patched up.
At Lila's loft, Lila confronts Dexter about the man in the parking lot. Dexter tells Lila that it was Jimenez, the man who killed his mother. LIla comforts Dexter, telling him that "nothing you could do could scare me away." Dexter believes her.
Rita puts Cody and Astor to bed. Cody asks if Dexter will come for breakfast in the morning. Rita explains that she and Dexter broke up.
A newly resolute Dexter drives to hunt down Jimenez. Recovery is no longer an option. Dexter relishes the feeling of setting up a kill.
Doakes walks into the station. Maria greets him warmly, but nobody else is happy to see him. Maria tells Doakes that she's set up a meeting at the Hilton for Doakes to meet with Stillwater Security.
Lundy and Doakes meet. Lundy tells Doakes that four of his cases were Bay Harbor Butcher victims, cases where Doakes was unable to get convictions. Lundy tells Doakes that the bloodwork on the cases were faulty. Doakes smiles, and tells Lundy he was unaware of the errors in the bloodwork, and walks out of the meeting.
Deb and Angel continue to go over Asher's notes. Deb discovers notes from 9pm on the night Rodrigo disappeared. Asher's notes contain a license plate and a notation that Rodrigo "must be drunk" because he was being carried by another man. Deb realizes that the driver of the car must have been the Bay Harbor Butcher.
Dexter stakes out The Swamp, the bar where Jimenez works. Using his GPS tracking device, Dexter follows Jimenez to a remote cabin in the everglades. Dexter spies on Jimenez through the cabin windows and sees packages of cocaine. Dexter turns on the radio in Jimenez' truck to lure him out. Jimenez comes out, gun drawn. Seeing that it is his car radio, he lowers his gun. Dexter quickly anesthetizes him, and asks,"Did you really think the radio turned itself on?"
Deb runs license plate numbers late into the night. Lila shows up with dinner for Dexter. Deb happily informs Lila that Dexter isn't there, and that he lied to her about working late. Upset, Lila leaves.
Maria and the Stillwater contact wait on Doakes at the Hilton, but Doakes is busy breaking into Dexter's apartment. As Maria assures the Stillwater guy that Doakes is eager to meet with him, Doakes begins methodically searching Dexter's apartment for evidence.
Lundy, Deb and Angel can't find a match to the plate number in Ascher's notes. Lundy suggests trying other states. Almost immediately, a match is found - Charles Lewis. Angel is relieved it is not a cop. Deb runs a check and discovers that Charles Lewis couldn't be their man - he's been locked up since before Rodrigo went missing, and his vehicle was seized as evidence - in their own impound lot. Realizing that anyone from Metro police could have checked the car out, Lundy asks for the sign-out records. Angel tells him that there are no records - since only members of the department have access, there was never any reason to keep records. Lundy, now armed with proof that the Bay Harbor Butcher is one of there own, swears Deb and Angel to secrecy.
Meanwhile, in Doakes continues his search of Dexter's apartment. He zeroes in on the air conditioning unit.
Jimenez wakes up to find himself prepped for the kill. Dexter collects his blood sample. Jimenez begs for his life and offers Dexter cocaine. Dexter tells him to accept his fate. Dexter fires up a chain saw and remarks "Kind of fitting, don't you think?"
Rita and the kids arrive home. Astor lets herself in without a key. Rita wonders how the door got open. Unseen by Rita, Lila's shadow moves to the back of the house.
Dexter, exhausted from avenging his mother's death, goes through Jimenez' wallet. He pulls out a slip of paper and sees "Starlight Lanes, 7pm" written on it. Dexter realizes that Lila told Jimenez where to find him. His cell phone rings. It's Rita calling. She asks Dexter if he was at the house earlier, because the door was left open. Dexter checks his key ring and realizes Rita's house key is missing. Alarmed, Dexter tells Rita to get out of the house and to call the police.
Pulling off his blood spattered gear, Dexter yells "Don't you move!" at the dismembered body of Jimenez, and runs to Rita's.
At Rita's, the police tell Dexter that everything is okay. Dexter tells them to stay and watch Rita, to their mild amusement. Dexter explains that he works for the police department. They agree to watch Rita.
At Lila's loft, a furious Dexter confronts Lila and demands Rita's key. Dexter warns Lila to never bother Rita again. He asks her why she called Jimenez. Lila pleads with Dexter, telling him that she was only trying to get Dexter back, and that it kind of worked because Dexter stayed with her after Jimenez attacked him. Dexter tells Lila that she's more dangerous to him than his addiction will ever be. He warns Lila to stay away - or she will finally see the monster that he can be.
It's a new morning as Dexter Morgan (Michael C. Hall) leaves new girlfriend Lila Tournay's (Jaime Murray) loft. He notices that her outside hall light is burned out, and suggests that it should be fixed. Lila tells Dexter that she's complained about the light to her landlord repeatedly. Lila impulsively walked across the hall and shatters the light outside her landlord's apartment, claiming that "Now he'll have to fix it." Dexter admires Lila for taking things into her own hands.
Meanwhile, former girlfriend Rita Bennett (Julie Benz) is awakened by her mother, Gail (JoBeth Williams) who tells Rita to take charge of her day.
At Dexter's apartment, he and sister Debra Morgan (Jennifer Carpenter) talk. Dexter tells Deb that he and Rita broke up. Deb tells him to apologize to her and that it will all blow over.
At the station, Angel Batista (David Zayas) has news for Dexter - the Bay Harbor Butcher has sent a 32-page manifesto to the Tribune. An excited Dexter privately congratulates himself - he's about to be published. Dexter is happy to be the one controlling the Special Task Force for a change, instead of the other way around.
Sgt James Doakes (Erik King) investigates a pool-side crime scene. Lt. Maria Laguerta (Lauren Velez) asks him if his "issues" have been resolved. Maria warns Doakes that if he bullies Dexter, she won't be responsible for any fallout.
At the station, Camilla (Margo Martindale) visits Dexter in his lab. She tells Dexter that Doakes asked for the 1973 shipping yard murder case files. Camilla confesses that Doakes frightened her, but that she stalled him. Camilla worries that if Doakes finds out that she destroyed the files for Dexter's father Harry, that she'll be fired and will lose her pension. Dexter assures her that Doakes won't be a problem.
Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine) searches his iPod for the right tunes to listen to while he ponders the Bay Harbor Butcher. Lundy explains to Deb that the truth speaks to him from a peaceful place. Deb tells Lundy that she thrives on chaos.
At the poolside crime scene, Dexter photographs the stepfather, Mr. Wilson ,(Dale Midkiff) of the dead girl. Dexter immediately realizes that the stepfather's shirt lacks evidence of forceful blood spatter. The stepfather explains that the blood on his shirt was from performing CPR on his stepdaughter. Knowing that the stepfather is innocent, Dexter nonetheless collects his shirt for evidence. Doakes tells Dexter that the stepfather and girl fought all the time. Dexter deliberately misleads Doakes, telling him that he saw evidence of blood mist on the shirt.
A phone call from Lila interrupts Dexter's work at the crime scene. Lila tells Dexter that she sold her sculpture, "The Cannibals."
Later that evening, Dexter and Lila go out to dinner to celebrate, but find that they can't be seated because they did not make a reservation. After some creative lying by Lila, they are seated by a fountain. Lila and Dexter drink champagne to celebrate. Dexter worries momentarily about whether the alcohol is a slip in his recovery, but Lila assures him that he's a heroin addict, not an alcoholic.
At Rita's house, an overbearing Gail rehearses Cody (Preston Bailey) on his Saudi Arabia talk for school. Cody wonders if Dexter will be at his school program. Gail reminds Cody and Astor (Christina Robinson) that Dexter is a drug addict. Rita arrives home, much to the kids' relief, but Gail immediately sends them to bed. Rita encourages her mother to apply for a teaching job, but Gail informs Rita that she's going to devote all her time to Cody and Astor instead.
At the station the next morning, Lundy briefs the task force. He has secured an injunction against the Tribune so that they can't publish the manifesto. The team searches for clues. Angel points out that the manifesto contains literary references. Vince Masuka (C.S. Lee) argues that it references Deep Space 9.
Later that evening at the gym, Gabriel (Dave Baez) and Deb run side by side on treadmills. Deb tunes him out, listening to Lundy's Chopin on her iPod instead.
Deb arrives at Dexter's apartment to discover a naked Lila in the kitchen. Deb goes into Dexter's bedroom to talk to him. Deb questions Dexter's judgement. Dexter defends himself. Upset, Deb leaves. Lila comforts Dexter.
Doakes grills the stepfather, Wilson, of the murdered girl. Maria is dubious about Doakes' relentlessness. Dexter watches with private satisfaction as the Special Task Force argue about the manifesto. He sees Doakes terrorizing the stepfather of the murdered girl, and slips into Doakes' office. Dexter hids the blood report under other files on Doakes' desk.
Lundy breaks for lunch. Deb tells Lundy that Rita and Dexter broke up. She confesses that she's also been listening to Chopin.
Doakes continues with his relentless interrogation of Wilson. Maria watches with concern. Dexter, in passing, asks Maria why Wilson is still at the station, and why Doakes is interrogating an innocent man. Dexter tells Maria that he told Doakes at the crime scene that there was no blood mist on the shirt, and that the blood report supported Wilson's story.
Maria lets Wilson go. Doakes and Maria argue. Doakes realizes that Dexter set him up, but Maria won't listen to him. Maria and Doakes argue.
At dinner, Gabe and Deb talk. Deb breaks up with Gabe, who is confused and doesn't want to break up. Deb tells him that "the truth speaks from a peaceful place" and that Gabe isn't "the one."
Dexter and Lila take a late night walk. Dexter wonders about the suddeness of all the changes going on in his life. Dexter and Lila break into a random house to have sex.
Cody calls Dexter and invites him to his school program. Gail picks up the phone and hangs up on Dexter. Dexter is depressed.
Rita arrives home, only to find that her mother has sent the kids to bed because Cody called Dexter. Rita informs her mother that she did some checking and found out that Gail was fired from her teaching job. Rita tells her mother that nobody can deal with her. Gail accuses Rita of passing on "ordinary character" to her children. Rita tells Gail to pack up and go home.
At the station the next morning, Angel quotes the manifesto to Dexter, who notes privately that the manifesto was made up of random blog posts - "presto manifesto."
Doakes, hiding in Dexter's office, confronts Dexter. Doakes tells Dexter that he did some checking and found no paper trail on Dexter. Dexter tells Doakes that he'll always be one step ahead of him and head-butts Doakes. Dexter quickly walks away, into the public area of the station. Out of nowhere, Doakes appears, and tackles Dexter in front of the entire station. After Doakes is pulled off of Dexter, Maria takes Doakes' badge, ID and gun, and puts him on administrative leave. As Doakes walks away, a shaken Dexter tells Angel that he had no clue as to why Doakes would attack him. Angel comforts Dexter.
Lundy and Deb sit in on a meeting at the Tribune. Lundy agrees to drop the injunction provided that the Tribune agrees to not print the victims' names and to put the story on page 3.
After the meeting, Lundy and Deb have lunch on a quiet bench at a park. Deb confesses to Lundy that she doesn't like the quiet, but wants to practice while Lundy is around. She tells Lundy that she finds strength in him. Lundy wonders what he's supposed to say, and tries to discourage Deb from being interested in him. Deb kisses Lundy.
At Cody's school, Dexter gives Cody some last-minute encouragement.
Meanwhile, Lila collects a check for $18k for "The Cannibals" at her apartment. Lila sulks.
In the station house, the task force argues about the Bay Harbor Butcher. Lundy watches the ensuing chaos, and then suddenly has a moment of clarity. Lundy realizes that the killer has a law enforcement background.
At school, Cody reads his report. Dexter's phone vibrates. It's Lila. Dexter ignores her call. As Cody continues reading his report, Lila sets The Cannibals on fire with a torch. The sculpture goes up in flames. Lila sets her chair on fire as Cody takes his bows to generous applause. Lila's loft is in flames.
Outside of the school, Astrid invites Dexter to go with them for ice cream. Dexter agrees. His phone rings. It's Lila. Dexter explains to Rita that he has to leave. Rita draws Astrid and Cody close to her as Dexter walks away.
Dexter finds Lila in her burned-out apartment. As Dexter comforts her, Lila pleads with him to never leave her. Dexter looks up and sees that the landlord has fixed her hall light, which now glows brightly amidst the smoldering blackness of Lila's apartment.